


Shiver

by orphan_account



Category: Pretty Little Liars
Genre: Alison is a Hastings (but they don't know yet), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Ian Thomas is incredibly creepy, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Spencer and Jason were never siblings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-25
Updated: 2015-07-25
Packaged: 2018-04-11 02:44:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4418072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Canon divergent fic where Spencer and Jason were never siblings, Jason came back to Rosewood the day after Alison's funeral, Spencer and Jason talked the night Wren kissed her, and the Ian Thomas situation was worse than Spencer remembered.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shiver

**Author's Note:**

> Content warnings: Underage, as Spencer is 16 and Jason is 22. Should be noted nothing more than kissing occurs. Warning for loss of agency as well, as there is a scene described where Ian Thomas put the moves on Spencer while she is in a drug-induced stupor. Spencer's drug addiction is referenced, as is Jason's alcoholism.

The night Wren hits on her, Spencer feels sick to her stomach; it’s just like Ian Thomas all over again, all unwanted touching and breaking of boundaries she isn’t sure she’d signaled were welcome to be broken. She doesn’t remember if she returned the advances or pushed him away, can’t be sure if she messed everything up or if she was stronger this time; regardless, she’s pretty sure Melissa saw them, and knowing her sister, anything she says will be ignored.

She runs out of the house in a rush, unsure of where she’s going to go; she never told any of the other girls about the thing with Ian, and isn’t sure she wants to tell them now. If “A” is anything to be believed, she’s sure it’ll come out on its own anyway. Without realizing, her feet have carried her over the well-worn path between her yard and the DiLaurentis backyard; the new girl, Maya, and her family are almost done moving in, but as far as she’s aware, they’re not yet living there with all the construction and investigation going on following the discovery of Alison’s body.

Quietly, Spencer drifts toward the spot where they found her, transfixed by the torn-up earth, nose tingling at the scent of raw dirt. She doesn’t know how long she stands there, but by the time she thinks to move away from the roped-off hole in the ground, a shiver has crept up her spine and her teeth are chattering. She winds her arms around her middle and starts to back away from where her feet seem to have taken root when she hears a creak from the direction of the DiLaurentis’s back porch. Turning sharply, she calls out, “Who’s there?”

A beat passes before Jason DiLaurentis steps off the porch, his hands held up in surrender. “Just me, Spencer.”

“Jason?” she asks, incredulous. She slowly walks toward him, arms gripping each other tightly. “When did you get back to Rosewood?”

“The day after the funeral.” Jason shrugs off his jacket and hands it to Spencer before sitting back down on the porch.

Spencer puts the jacket on and joins him without hesitating. “Why weren’t you here for the service? Even Jenna Marshall went.”

“I dunno, Spencer, it just...didn’t feel right. It didn’t feel like closure. Plus I haven’t seen my parents in months and I didn’t want to see them for that.”

Spencer hums in acknowledgement, burrowing her hands into the deep pockets on Jason’s jacket, trying to get some blood-flow back in her fingers.

“So,” he starts, “what brings you out here at this hour?”

Spencer knows she doesn’t owe Jason anything, knows she could make something up and he’d take her word on it, but for some reason, she finds herself spilling everything; from the Jenna Thing to Ian to A to Wren. It all comes pouring out of her and once she starts, she can’t stop. She isn’t even aware she’s started shaking again until he puts an arm around her and pulls her in for a hug.

“I just...I don’t know what to do anymore. Everything changed that night with Jenna and even more that night Alison disappeared, and now? Everything is a mess and no matter what I do, I keep making things worse,” she mumbles into his shoulder.

Jason is running his hand up and down her arm, both in an effort to soothe her shaking, and to warm her up some more. “Y’know, Alison told me about the Jenna thing before, but she said it was all your idea...for some reason, I didn’t fully believe her, even though we all knew how the two of you tried to one-up each other at every turn. I guess I just didn’t want to believe Alison had made you into the kind of person she was.”

Spencer sits up, pulling away from Jason, and drags her hand through her hair. “Well, it looks like it’s a little late for that.”

“I don’t believe that.”

She laughs bitterly and stares at him. “Are you kidding? I’ve just ruined my sister’s engagement, regardless of it being Alison’s idea or not that night I didn’t stop her blinding Jenna, and Detective Wilden is circling me and my friends as if we may have murdered Ali to try and take her throne as It Girl. From everyone’s view, I am just like Alison.”

“Do you know why I came out here tonight, Spencer? Why I’m sitting here staring at the place she was killed instead of the place she was put to rest?” Spencer shakes her head no and Jason continues. “Because that place where she’s put to rest doesn’t mean anything, it doesn’t have any ties to Alison. This place, where she was left to die, this is the last place she was Alison, the last place she was my sister. I came here because I wanted to see it for myself, and to see if it was too much for you, knowing she died so close to our homes. I didn’t imagine I’d actually see you, especially given how many times I chickened out from knocking on your door, but…”

“Why do you even care, Jason? It’s not like we were ever friends.”

“You don’t remember much of that summer, do you? I guess you wouldn’t, given your...problem.”

“You mean my addiction. It’s not a dirty word, Jason, and it’s not like you’re a stranger to it.”

Jason raises his eyebrows at her and she quiets. “Anyway, there were more than a few times where you...I don’t quite know how to explain it. You seemed like you were completely out of it, and Alison just left you to fend for yourself. You only remember kissing Ian Thomas the one time, but it was more than that. I caught him with you not long after the time you described, but you were so far gone you didn’t know what was happening. I pulled him off you, decked him, and told him to leave you alone or I’d tell Melissa everything.”

A chill that has nothing to do with the weather creeps down Spencer’s back and she closes her eyes in a grimace. “That’s why he practically ran out of every room I was in, isn’t it?”

“Probably.” Jason stands up and goes to lean on the porch railing, looking toward the Hastings house. Spencer follows him quietly, and their shoulders press together firmly as they stare out  into the night. “Seeing you stumbling around that summer was part of what broke me out of my own stupor. You were young and impressionable and I didn’t want anyone to take advantage of you. You might have been Alison’s friend, not mine, but all that meant was that people thought you were playing on a different level than you wanted to be on. Alison, she thrived on danger and straddled the line of propriety so much that the line seemed to vanish altogether when she was involved. That didn’t mean you had to get dragged into her world too. Not when you couldn’t help it.”

Spencer slips her hand into Jason’s, twists their fingers together, and squeezes gently. “Thank you.”

They stay standing like that for what feels like hours, until Spencer finally pulls her hand back. “I should probably go face the music. It’s not going to be any better in the morning.”

Jason nods. “Do you want me to walk you back?”

“What, the whole twenty feet?” Spencer asks jokingly. “I think I’ll live.” Her eyes widen at her remark, realizing their implications in this spot, but Jason laughs anyway.

“You never did have much trouble surviving tough times, Spence. Keep the jacket, it’s probably colder in your house than out here.”

Spencer smiles, and, before she can talk herself out of it, rocks forward to press her mouth softly to Jason’s, her hand gently cupping his face before she pulls away again. “I mean it, Jason. Thank you. For everything.”

Jason kisses her forehead, and pushes her toward the steps leading off the porch. “Go. I’ll be in town a few more days. I’ll find you around.”

Spencer jumps off the porch and heads through the trees back to her house, turning around once she reaches the backdoor; Jason is still where she left him, watching her, and when she lifts her hand up in a wave, he mimics the gesture. As she reaches for the doorknob, she finds she’s no longer afraid of Melissa’s wrath, or her mother’s. For the first time since Alison disappeared, she feels...safe.

 

 


End file.
